Emotional effects of dating a married man
If this is your first visit to this site I recommend reading my Libra and Cancer compatibility article on this relationship first.
I also have a Libra man guide and Cancer woman guide which contain a lot of questions and answers related to this relationship.
Although Aspies (i.e., people with Aspergers) do feel affection towards others, relationships are not a priority for them in the same way that it is for neurotypicals or NTs (i.e., individuals without Aspergers). An NT partner needs to understand her Aspie’s background in order to work with him on their marriage.
She will need patience and perseverance as well as understanding that he functions on a different emotional level to her. Aspies do marry, and while NT partners can be frustrated by their lack of emotion and physical contact, their Aspergers spouses do bring strengths into the relationship.
If there is open communication, the NT partner can help her Aspie to improve in areas of weakness and encourage him in the things he is naturally good at. Aspies often has a specific area of weakness in marriage.
They often do not feel the need to express love, and the NT partner can help them understand that this is important. As young adults, they are often emotionally immature and have poor social skills.
The key is two people who want to keep trying.• Anonymous said… It's easy for people to say "everyone is wired differently" but let's be honest - that puts the burden on the non-aspie partner to figure out how to deal because the aspie really cannot contribute to resolving the language barrier that happens in this situation.
Women who understand what it's like to be married to someone with Aspergers - no one else can even begin to understand the challenge. She is trying to understand and reach out for help. There were some arguments that I now understand were down to mutual misunderstanding from our brains being "wired differently" .
This is our agreement." "You can't be around chemicals, so you have to sweep, vacuum, and do the laundry." Getting emotional usually frustrates and/or shuts my husband down. Sure we didnt know I had as when we got married or for years but it sure helps to know and learn how to communicate better.* Anonymous said...
Once I learned to take a step back, breathe, and think of a reasonable argument in a calm, low tone, things got SO much better. I'll talk from your hubsnd's perspective, if you'll permit.
No one with AS wants conflict or strife, as it only serves to worsen the anxiety and depression that is so common in this disorder.
Take the time to explain how his behavior made you feel, and most importantly tell him EXACTLY what you want him to do differently.If you would like to post your own experience or question please use the form at the bottom of this page. I don't know if we could make a long term relationship work, but man I feel more chemistry with him than anyone else.