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I find the latter hard to believe, but find this mantra in every profile of every professional woman online. What you’re missing is that what you want has absolutely no relation to what women want. The problem is that many women from 27-34 are independent professionals just like their male peers.
Any advice on how to navigate these new paradigms in the dating world? And to directly address your email, I have to divide my response into two different parts: 1) What You’re Getting Right and 2) What You’re Missing. We’ve addressed this before, from an older man who couldn’t possibly fathom why a younger woman wouldn’t want to be with him. We can complain that the opposite sex is unrealistic and passing up great opportunities – and we’d be right – but it doesn’t change that people want what they want. They, too, have a lot of dating options, are busy building their careers, and don’t have a clear urgency to settle down. Theoretically, this is when want to have time before becoming dads.
Last weekend, those of us who engage in and follow the actions of #Black Twitter witnessed a vicious and viral debate over one familiar, yet unrelentingly inflammatory statement: “men are trash.” Soon after the remark was put out there and started to trend, the typical gender split occurred, arguments heated up and generalizations began flying left, right and center.
It was a message that I really feel Black men need to hear in reference to how we collectively choose to treat Black women.
I’m a 42 year old single male who recently left a 5 year relationship for various reasons, but mainly because I wanted kids and she did not.
I thought that since I was an attractive, fit, well-educated, financially and emotionally secure guy that I would have no problem finding a woman in her mid 30s to settle down with and start a family.
It even exploded into T-shirts being offered on a website stating, “Black Women Are Trash.” As with most 140-character debates, the true losers of this battle were nuance, context and mutual respect.
For those of us who sat back and morosely observed our men and women tear each other apart online, we found ourselves facing the same troubling and daunting question we’ve been struggling with since forever, “How do we bridge the gap between Black men and women?Or we can start by not punishing Black girls and Black women for being molested and being victims of sexual assaults, seeing as most of these assaults occur by people close to us.